Why Do We Have to Remain Quiet?

I learned some extremely valuable information last week. While I'm grateful to have been privvy to this info, it also really enraged me. There was a point in time where I was having phone conversations and swapping emails, as well as pictures, with my nutritionist. (She works for my surgeon) Since transportation was an issue for me and I wasn't able to get rides to see her in person (it was 3 hrs one way!) I was very grateful for her help via alternative options. As I'm sure you can tell, I was just as detailed about my daily regiment with her as I have been with y'all. I'm sure you can imagine my euphoria when I told her all about the liquid protein vials I had found to mix with my high protein powders to make my infamous "Super Protein" shakes. I was really proud of myself for being able to get in a full days worth of protein FOR BREAKFAST! I just knew I'd be a great rule follower! :) Thankfully, my nutritionist was excited and cheered me on! She wanted pictures of the liquid protein to pass this info onto other patients. Life was great! :) Little by little as time progressed, my hair started to fall out. Well, I read in this book "Weight Loss Surgery for Dummies" that at about 4 months post op this will happen to you if you're not getting enough protein. I just dismissed it because well...after all, I'm getting more than enough protein every day and even my nutritionist says I'm doing great! Since I found out I was pregnant, my communications began to diminish with my surgeon and nutritionist. I just feel like it's because they weren't happy with me getting pregnant just 3 months post op. I can't say I'm totally shocked. Not everyone is going to share in my joy! Now that we've moved to North Carolina, I had to (obviously) get a new obstetrician. Would you believe the doctor I was given is a bariatric patient too?!!!! How awesome is that?! And...she was pregnant soon after too. (So I feel better and less like a leper!) But, as I was telling her about my "Super Protein" breakfasts...she quickly stops to interject this vital piece of information: OUR BODIES CAN ONLY PROCESS ABOUT 20G OF PROTEIN AT ONE TIME, THEREFORE EVERYTHING OVER THAT IS BEING WASTED! I was taken aback. But, we kept chatting and then my boyfriend and I got to hear our baby's heartbeat for the first time and forgot all about what I had just heard. After a couple days I was thinking about that conversation and it hit me like a ton of bricks: I HAVE NOT BEEN GETTING ALL THE PROTEIN I'VE NEEDED LIKE I THOUGHT...LIKE MY NUTRITIONIST ENSURED ! Then, as any mom would, I began "What-If'ing" myself: what if my baby has been harmed? What if there's a problem? What if I've really damaged my body? WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD MY NUTRITIONIST NOT KNOW THAT WHAT I WAS DOING WAS WRONG AND THEN "OK" IT AND LEAD ME TO BELIEVE I WAS DOING THE RIGHT THINGS? I'm currently awaiting for the results of the slew of blood work done last week. I just continue to feel like I haven't been given correct information and have been quietly guided away from all things that may not be POSITIVE and uplifting. But, guess what?! NOT EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE POSITIVE AND HAPPY AND GREAT! There are always going to be downfalls, missteps and negative sides; to having weight loss surgery or ANYTHING you do in life. Why are we supposed to keep quiet about negative side effects? Why? As you can see I'm just extrememly upset. I don't understand. I just don't. It's not even about my hair. Yes, especially as a female, having long, thick, curly hair has been my "thing" ... so to now have bald spots, thin, whispy hair that's falling out in chunks daily isn't my perfect idea of reality but I DON'T WANT MY BABY TO SUFFER. However, I've been more diligent since last week to ensure I'm drinking protein every 90 minutes so I *know* my body is processing enough. It's just the previous months that worry me. Thankfully, my OB has assured me everything's going to be fine...but when you're pregnant, that doesn't really help. But I appreciate the effort! I haven't contacted my "nutritionist" because I don't think I can successfully write an email that can NICELY explain my findings without giving a tongue lashing. I am 150% positive a phone call is DEFINITELY out of the question. But, best believe in the near future I will be contacting her so I can teach her something new. Until next time...